Peter Alsop

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Stuck On You Country & Western Transylvania Love Song

Junkfood Junkie (Larry Groce) Man Oh Man I Can

It’s Gonna Be Okay L.A. Freeway Song

Doin’ It For You Garbage (Bill Steele)

Strength My Secret

Sandrock Canyon

STUCK ON YOU

We met at the disco-hop

I'd started to freak-out

But when the joint got busted

You helped me to sneak-out

I lost my stash, began to crash

My knees were gettin' weak

Then you took out your tube of glue

And y'got some on my cheek, and now I'm

Stuck on you, stuck on you

Stuck on you from sniffin' glue

Nothin' that my heart can do, cause I'm

Stuck on you from sniffin' glue!

Mom and Dad will be so mad

They won't know what to do

Cause in their car I went too far

An' I got attached to you!

Somehow our eyelids inter-laced

I can't deny that we've embraced

Or Dad will say that we're two-faced

And I'll get pasted!! What'll I do? I'm,

Chorus

You got hooked on model planes

But that was just the start

Then plastic cars and boats and trains

Replaced me in your heart

I gave you my last Duco tube

The kind that overflows

But you wouldn't save a 'sniff' for me

Y'just jammed it in your nose!

And still I'm

Chorus

JUNKFOOD JUNKIE

by Larry Groce

Well you know I love that organic cookin'

I always ask for more

They call me Mr. Natural

On down to the health food store

I only eat good sea-salt

White sugar don't touch my lips

And my friends is always beggin' me to take 'em

On macro-biotic trips

But at night I take out my strongbox

That I keep under lock and key

And I take it off to my closet

Where nobody else can see

I open that lid so slowly

Take a peek up North and South

Then I pull out a Hostess Twinkie

And I pop it in my mouth!

In the daytime I'm Mr. Natural

Just as healthy as I can be

But at night I'm a junkfood junkie

Good Lord have pity on me!

Well at lunch time you can always find me

At the Whole Earth Vitamin Bar

Just suckin' on my plain white yogurt

From a hand thrown pottery jar

And sippin' little hand-pressed cider

With a carrot stick for desert

And wipin' my face in a natural way

On the sleeve of my peasant shirt!

But when that clock strikes midnight

And I'm all by myself

I'm working that combination

On my secret hide-away shelf

I pull out some Fritos Corn Chips

Doctor Pepper and an Old Moon Pie,

Then I sit back in glorious expectation

Of a genuine junk food high!

Chorus

My friends down at the commune

They think I'm pretty neat

I don't know nothin' 'bout arts and crafts

But I give 'em all something to eat

I'm a friend to old Euell Gibbons

And I only eat home grown spice

I got a John Keats autograph Grecian urn

Filled up with my brown rice

But folks, lately I have been spotted

With a Big Mac on my breath

Stumblin' into a Colonel Sanders With a face as white as death

I'm afraid some day they'll find me

Just stretched out on my bed

With a handful of Pringle's Potato Chips

And a Ding-Dong by my head!

Chorus

IT'S GONNA BE OKAY

No one said love would be easy,

I admit it don't look good right now

But we'll get through this, like the last one

We always seem to make it through somehow

It's gonna be okay, I know it will

As long as we can stay together

It's gonna be okay

It's an old trick of time

He keeps movin' our finish line

Please don't cry

You know that tears won't wash things clear

Love's a trail that we have to try

We won't get lost, we've got each other here

Chorus

When the present gets uncomfortable

And tomorrow seems too far away

I hear you sigh like Old December

Close your eyes and remember what we used to say

It's gonna be okay, I know it will

As long as we can stay together

It's gonna be okay

You got to roll with the waves today

It's gonna be okay, I know it will

As long as we can stay together

It's gonna be okay

DOIN’ IT FOR YOU

I treat you politely Baby

And so you can’t complain

I hold the door when you go out

And when you go in again

The only time I interrupt

Is when you talk too slow

And I’ve been teaching you the questions

To the answers that I know

So why, why, why?

You’re tryin’ to rearrange me?

Why, why, why?

You’re always tryin’ to change?

Why, why, why?

Should you want somethin’ new?

When I’m only, doin’ it for you!

I let you make my breakfast

Though you always burn my eggs

I take you into public places

With that hair upon your legs

And when my friends come over

I never make you leave

And I helped you with them dishes

For that dinner, Christmas Eve

Chorus

I only come to bed at night

To satisfy your need

I’m good and fast, I know you like

To stay awake and read.

You say I ain’t kind to you

But when we went to lunch

You spilled your soup all over me

And I only hit you once!

Chorus

I'm only doin' it to you!

STRENGTH

Strength is a quality hard to define

For it comes in a number of ways

And it takes different shapes

In the people we love

Sometimes it's an ember

Sometimes it's a blaze

My Father could carry my brothers and me

On his back and we laughed til we cried

And he made us play straight

When we got off the track

But he'd never say much of what he felt inside

His business came first,

And we all understood,

'Cause he carried his family well

And he'd always explain

And his reasons were good

And his logic rang clear as the toll of a bell

Chorus

My Mother did mother-work for most of her life

We depended on her to get by

She'd sing in the kitchen to the dishes at night

And sleep with a smile

And love in her eyes

Young love is strong love as long as it stays

When you wake-up your dreams just won't shine

Now her African Violets take up her days

As she patiently waits for the door bell to chime.

Chorus

My Father got married again I've been told

Strength of character can't keep him warm

And it's hard for my mother to break from her mold

So she's built her own house

Where she's safe from the storms

At night when the stars become crystal cold lights

And my life gets so clear I can't sleep

Deep in my mirror

I gaze at the sights

And I see the lion

And I see the sheep

Strength is a quality hard to define

For it comes in a number of ways

And it takes different shapes

In the people we love

Sometimes it's an ember

Sometimes it's a blaze

SANDROCK CANYON

I've been hiding up in Sandrock Canyon

No one's caught me cause there's no one there

It's cold and lonely up in Sandrock Canyon

Stolen money can't buy someone to care.

Words I hear I can't believe she told me

When I met her at her door

She was clear, she didn't want to hold me,

She said she'd rather we were poor

Lord, I wish I'd known before!

Chorus

Late at night the winds blow 'round me

I never knew I'd be so scared

The moon is bright, but no one's found me

I must have caught them unprepared

I wanted her to know I cared!

Chorus

Desperation drove me from my cover

I had to tell her why I ran

But in the dark she held another lover

Now I think I understand

How sandrock crumbles into sand

I hope they find me up in Sandrock Canyon

I can't stop shakin' in this cold night air

I been cryin' up in Sandrock Canyon, cause

Stolen money can't buy someone to care

No, stolen money can't buy someone to care

COUNTRY AND WESTERN TRANSYLVANIA LOVE SONG

Bob Lincoln was a werewolf

Now he lies beneath the ground

With a silver bullet deep within his chest.

He was shot by Hattie Williams

The tru'est lover ever found,

Tho' she cried that night she sent him to his rest.

Howl to the moon Bob Lincoln,

Howl to the moon

Hattie's gone and shot you down

To keep your heart from prowlin' round,

Of all the wolves she know'd

She loved you best!

A full moon smiled down that night

Upon the Junior Prom

Bob drove his Daddy's hearse to Hattie's tomb

He combed his face and rang the bell

He knew the chase was on,

When he caught the scent of her wolfsbane perfume!

Chorus

All the kids were at the Prom

At Transylvania High

Bob Lincoln danced the foxtrot like a fox,

But when Hattie caught him dancing

Cheek-to-cheek with Wilma Frye,

She thought she smelled a wolf in Bobby's sox!

Chorus

Bob knew that Hattie was upset,

He'd acted like a beast,

But he knew he couldn't stop his urge to roam

Then Hattie asked him quaintly

Why he hadn't worn his leash

"If you can't control your urges, take me home!"

Chorus

Now Hattie knew that werewolves roam

'Til their lovers shoot them down

So she took her hidden pistol from her hair

She had one silver bullet,

So she only fired one round

She got him where wolves really should be-ware!

Chorus

MAN OH MAN I CAN

As a window dresser at Macy's

My future held nothing in store

Until that day in the warehouse

When I spotted you there on the floor

I knew when I saw you that you were the one

But you needed some parts for your arm

So I gave you a hand, but your blouse came undone

I still feel shivers from all of your slivers

Though you're rough with me Baby, that's part of your charm!

Man, oh man, I love you, man, oh man, I can

Anyway I can

Love you all day

It's not right the way I love, man, oh man, I can

Our love is 'knot holy'

'Wooden' you say?

I know that you're bald, but I don't care at all

Cause I know how self-conscious you are

And you always have a smile for me when I call

I love kissing your lips, though they're missing some chips

From banging around in the trunk of my car!

That blond hair on my collar, you know, that you found?

Well, she's just a dummy I knew long ago

Now you're mad! I can tell, cause you won't make a sound

Must I tap little rhythms on you with my thumb??

Mom always said you'd make a good drum!

Your eternal beauty will never run down

I won't let you warp or decay

When you're old, if you get board, you can lumber around

In my yard where the woodpeckers stay

They'll build nests in your head and keep termites away!

Chorus

THE L.A. FREEWAY SONG

Have you ever lost your way while you were driving through L.A.?

And did you notice all the places that you passed along the way?

Just take the first initial of each turn you had to guess

And you will have a word which will describe Los Angeles!

"H" is for the lovely Harbor Freeway

"C" for Century Boulevard, (oops!) too far

"C" is for that Cloverleaf in Compton

Or was it for the Cop who stopped my Car

"P" will take you back to Pasadena, when

"W's for Westwood Where you Want to be!

Just put them all together they spell,..HCC-PW!!

That's just about what L.A. means to me!

GARBAGE

by Bill Steele

Mr. Thompson calls the waiter

Orders steak and baked potater

Then he leaves the bone and gristle

And he never eats the skin

The busboy comes and takes it

With a cough contaminates it

Then he throws it in a can

With coffee grinds and sardine tins

A truck comes by on Friday

And carts it all away

And a thousand trucks just like it

Are converging on the bay

Garbage, garbage

Filling up the sea with garbage

Garbage, garbage

What will we do when there's

No place left to put all of the garbage???

Mr. Johnson starts his cadillac

Winds it up the freeway track

Leaving friends and neighbors

In a hydro-carbon haze

He's joined by lots of smaller cars

All sending gases to the stars

There to form a seething cloud

That hangs for thirty days

While the sun licks down upon it

With its ultra-violet tongues

It turns to smog and settles down

Right inside your lungs

Garbage, garbage

Filling up our lungs with garbage

Garbage, garbage

What will we do when there's

Nothing left to breathe but, garbage???

Getting home and taking off his shoes

He settles down with the evening news

While the kids do homework

With the T.V. in one ear

While Superman for the thousandth time

Sells talking dolls and conquers crime

They dutifully learn

The date of birth of Paul Revere

In the paper there's a piece

About the mayor's middle name

And he gets it done in time

To watch the all-star Bingo Game!

Garbage, garbage 'Filling up our minds with garbage

Garbage, garbage

What will we do when there's

Nothing left to sing about, nothing left to talk about

Nothing left to look like, and nothing left to smell like,

Nothing left to be, but garbage?????

MY SECRET

I've got a secret, how 'bout you?

Let's tell each other what we do!

I've got a secret, how 'bout you?

Friday night I'm feelin' right, cause I get paid

Right back to my little room, and I pull the shade

Off with pants and quickly on with that dress I made

Wig in place, I paint my face and my arms with marmalade!

Nobody knows my secret!

Nobody shares in my fun!

I walk around in my nylons

Cause I don't want them to run!

Everyone hides some secret thing they've done,

So if you're strange, don't make a change,

Spread your jam and hug your lamb,

And let your vibrator hummmm!

Chorus

All week long I drive a truck, I'm kind of shy

But I read Playboy Magazine, like a normal guy

And I love eatin' my Mom's homemade apple pie

But no one knows her marmalade goes in the pantyhose I buy!

Nobody knows my secret

Nobody shares in my fun!

I spread jelly on my belly,

I spread it on my buns!

I'll tell you, if you'll tell me,

Do you get hot with your bathroom locked?

Well I cool my nerves with Mom's preserves

It's just a difference of degree!

Chorus